The Liberty fabric above costs roughly $45/yard, slightly less if you're a lucky eBay bidder (click on the image if you feel lucky, punk). And though I often recommend that if you possibly can, you should sew with Liberty prints, many people tell me that they couldn't possibly cut into such expensive fabric — even people who have been sewing for many more years than I have, even people who have made tailored jackets, for pete's sake. They're too afraid they'll screw it up.
So I was wondering about this, and decided (very uncharacteristically for me) to do the math. So let's say you buy fabric for four Liberty-print dresses: that's ($45*4 yds)*4, which would be $720.00.
And let's say that you ruin, beyond hope of recovery, ALL FOUR of your Liberty-print projects. That's a lot of money wasted, right? That's a month's rent for some people. Two or three car payments, maybe. Months of groceries, depending on how many teenage boys are in your household.
It's also 5.76 $125 dresses bought at a department store. (I'm taking $125 NOT as the median department-store dress price, but because it's the absolute maximum price I think I could bring myself to pay for a new dress off the rack.) Have you bought more than 6 dresses in your life that you didn't like? That you wore once, maybe? That hung in your closet until you pushed them into the forgiving arms of the Salvation Army? (Replace "$125 dress" with "$45 sweater" and "6" with "more than I want to recall" and you have MY experience.) What did you learn from buying those dresses? A lot less than you would have learned from trying to sew them, I wager.
Here I'm assuming (highly unlikely) that you would be unable to salvage anything that you had sewn … but I'm also assuming (highly likely) that you would learn a GREAT DEAL from four sewing projects, even if they were all sobbing failures. So much so that with the *next* project, you would most likely make something wearable.
That's just what failure is, or what it ought to be: failure is just figuring stuff out the hard way.
Almost every Saturday morning my little boy and I go roller-skating together. And every Saturday I tell my son (who HATES to fall down) that if he doesn't fall down, he won't learn anything. If you don't fall, you won't ever know how fast is too fast, how tight is too tight to take a turn, how soon (after a mega-blast blue-raspberry Slurpee) is too soon to head back to the floor. And if you don't screw up something — anything — in your life, you won't ever know how good you could have been.
So I *hate* it when someone tells me they don't want to try something because they might screw it up. So what? Unless what you're trying to do involves tightrope walking 5000 feet up, you probably won't DIE. And short of death, almost everything is fixable. Don't ask me for advice if that's not what you want to hear, because I'm the person who is going to tell you to take the new job, to ask the guy (or girl) out already, to move to the new city, to wear orange. I'll tell you to stop focusing on what you might lose, and start thinking about what you might LEARN.
Sometimes when people say they're afraid of failure, what they really mean is that they are afraid of humiliation. Which is completely understandable. But, speaking as someone who has felt humiliated more times than she'd like to remember, humiliation passes. (It passes like a kidney stone passes, but that's another story.) Not to mention that humiliation passes differently for each person: you remember it for months; the witnesses remember it for seconds (they have their own humiliations to obsess over, and don't have time for yours). You wake up the next morning, same as always. You head back into work, you run into that guy again ("Uh, hi!"), you get a new haircut to fix the one that wasn't such a good idea, after all. But at least you tried, and now you know something you didn't know before.
Or … you try, and it works! It works beyond your wildest dreams. (Insert wildest dreams here.) Even if it works a little bit short of your wildest dreams, that's still further along than you were yesterday. And there's no rule that you can't try again.
So, that thing? That thing you've been scared to try, because you think there's NO POSSIBLE WAY you could do it? That everyone would point and laugh when you fell? Today looks like an EXCELLENT day to give it a shot. Take it from me. (Everyone's looking the other way, anyway.) Go for it!
And if you're going to do it, you might as well wear something orange while you do. (I'm just saying.)
A Dress A Day 
Powerful words to live by. I’ve said the same things to my girls about making mistakes. I’ve always learned more from my failures than my successes.Reach for that inner child when you’re afraid you’ll make a mistake. My girls were fearless at the age of 2 and 3 so perhaps we need to take a lesson from that.
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Great entry today! And someone who is really, really worried about messing up when sewing with expensive fabric could always make a test copy in a cheaper fabric and end up with *two* dresses. And if they didn’t like the cheap dress, they could give it to someone who would!Monique in TX
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Maybe this particular fear (the fear of Liberty print) is also the fear that while it may be REALLY beautiful fabric, it might turn out to be a far from flattering skirt, dress, whatever. And so no matter how good a job one did, technically, with the sewing, maybe the real fear is that–for instance–people with bright red hair, very pale skin, and big blue eyes already have so much contrast going on, that they just don’t look as good in many-colored prints as they do in a tweedy olive/mole solid?
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Thank you. Just…thank you.
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OMG Erin I love you! Best rant evar.
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I like Monique’s point about taking a test run with the pattern first. And I think you can assess the appropriateness of a fabric by just draping it on yourself. Not the same as wearing a piece made of it, but you could re-sell 4 yds uncut. Fear, for me, is a reason to do things. I won’t not try. And as a big girl, this can lead to loads of humiliations when I try to do physical things, but I do not let fear of failure stop me.
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For me, it’s more the opportunity cost of that money spent on that fabric. I’d rather spend $720 on 144 yards of $5/yard cute cotton lawn prints (not name-brand Liberty), with which I could make 28.8 dresses! That’s a lot more practice for the same amount of money, if you aren’t too picky about brand names. 🙂
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Oh Erin!You’ve written something that speaks to exactly what I am dealing with right now — not the fabric but the taking of a risk. I took a risk to get where I am and I think I need to take another risk and move on.Thank you for this post.ps I always think of the cut part of the fabric as the edge of the seam allowance so it can be all raggedy any way. That helps a lot. Plus pinking shears.
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Your timing is impeccible, Erin. After 25 yrs sewing experience, I’ve decided I’ve done my last free alteration. Scarlett O’Hara style, I will never hem as a favor again!Now I am working up a small business card to post on our village bulletin boards. I am quite thrillingly terrified by the prospect of going semi-pro. Prom season is fast approaching.But I can’t do worse than Walmart, and I can do a darn sight better than most of the work I’ve seen people have paid for. Working up a price list has been enlightening. They charge *how much* for hemming? And I’ve been giving it away?! I’m a goldmine!The worker is worthy of her wages: my new mantra.
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So it’s “give me Liberty, or live in fear.”Great post, Erin. Great post.
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Erin, this is great! I got a little misty at the end. I’m in the middle of starting a small business (wedding videography) and a freelance career at the same time, so the subject of risk is on my mind everyday. Thank you for this wonderful reminder. I’m going to print this out and post it by my desk.
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Great Post! You brought tears to my eyes – ok, so I cry at everything, good, bad, sad, uplifting and inspiring.I have a non sewing project that I have been putting off since December out of fear that I’ll ruin something that cost me a lot of money… I need to just do it!Thanks Erin!!
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I’m a little bit like Erin in that I don’t like to make muslins. I just dive in and cut, and usually ruin a project or two or three or four or five. Actually I’ve lost count because I’ve *such* a short memory. Even though I’ve tossed many unsalvageable outfits, I’m still wearing a heck of a lot of things I made. Like today, I’m wearing *two* tops I gave birth too. Labor was hard, but well worth it.
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Holy fantastic! I, too, will have to print this out and post it because I’ve been too afraid of too many things for too long and it’s time for me to take life back by the balls. Also, anonymous 9:38, I have the same exact coloring and I wear the craziest prints I can get my hands on. The way I figure it, I’ve got so much color going on already, why not just run with it full force?
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I ditto the thanks above and the decision to print this and post it! I am currently working on my Ph.D. dissertation and it is the scariest, hardest thing I have ever done. (Then again, I have never yet sewed with fabric that cost me $45/yard.) Every day I have to convince myself that what I’m doing and learning is worth the fear of the unknown and the humiliation of speaking poorly in another language and the frustration of figuring out the rules as I go along. But you’re so right–I am learning every day, even on the days when stuff doesn’t turn out very well. I only stop learning when I stop trying. Thanks for the reminder.
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LOVE this post. Thankyou thankyou thankyou. Personally, I can’t stand Liberty. The fabric is gorgeous, but I aint a floral gal. But I do spend money on gorgeous fabric I love, and I do it so I can make clothes that look different from what everyone else is wearing, and fit to my own style expectations. And just for the record – I ALWAYS cut out of the nice fabric first. What the Hell. And like the Lazy Milliner, I sit here typing in an outfit I gave birth to. Thanks for the pep talk! Leah xxx
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Several years ago I bought a (for-me-then) fabulously expensive three yards of Liberty and made a dirndl skirt. I discovered I didn’t look very good in dirndl skirts, but you know I loved that skirt. I wore it to death because the fabric was awesome; I felt like a million bucks in it. I never got (m)any compliments, but I always felt radiant whenever I wore it. Thanks for the great post!
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Thanks for the pep talk. I’ve been thinking so much about my swimsuit experiment that I’ve nearly paralyzed myself with pressure and anxiety! I appreciate the reminder that I’ll certainly learn a lot from the experience, even if it is a failure. Thanks!
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Aaand that’s why I’m making the Butterick Walk-Away with the vintage grass-green Marimekko fabric and the lemon-yellow cotton lawn, though I know for fact that I look horrid in both colors unless I’m deeply bronzed. Something I haven’t been since I was about 9 and played outside for 3/4 of the day.Still. Carpe diem! My grandmother hoarded this fabric for decades and never made a thing from it. Far be it from me to allow another 30 years go by before this Marimekko print sees the light of day.Great to meet you face-to-face in NYC the other night! Next time I’ll wear the Walk-Away.
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Erin, thank you! You know how if you open yourself up to the universe, and put something (like a question) out there, that you will get help, that you will get your answer? I have been struggling with the idea of getting back in art again and fear of failure, humiliation, etc. has certainly been a part of it. But lately EVERYWHERE I look, I’m getting encouragement – so thank you again! Wow, OK, I’m all about long comments this week. 🙂
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Wonderful advice! We like to quote from Batman Begins around our house:”And why do we fall, Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.”
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Thank you, thank you, thank you. Just the kick in the arse I needed to get started on a Marfy dress for a wedding in September.Mermie
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There’s no success like failure.
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Erin–thank you for it. I’m going to Ebay right now to buy some Liberty fabric and make a nice summer skirt.This post is one for the ages. I’ve already sent it to a few of my friends.- Leslie at goodcrafternoon.com
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Oh boy, you got me squeezing a tear too today. Such wisdom… Love your tags: “encouragement” and “ranting” – not words I’d often associate, though you combine them so convincingly. You should come bottled, Erin, and the world could throw away it’s Prozac.A nice little enforcer of today’s lesson is the sequence from Swing Time with Fred Astaire playing a wannabe dancer with two left feet. His teacher, Ginger Rogers, sings him ‘Pick Yourself Up’. Cute thirties teacher dress on her too: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDXZkBIxso4&feature=relatedThanks again – I will steel myself for some tana-lawn scissoring very soon.
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Yes, nothing is more paralyzing than fear of failure. You must jump in and try. Nobody will die or get arrested. Do a trial run to take the edge off but TRY. And if you fail, go buy some more Liberty and try again.
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Thank you, Erin, I needed that today!
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Dear, dear Anonymous at 9:46, I am SO HAPPY for you that you’ve decided to go professional!! If you charge, you are professional, no “semi-pro” about it. You may not take on many clients, due to time constraints or personal choice, but you are absolutely correct about being professional. There are numerous publications available that will suggest what you should charge for what, and what you need for your IRS records, etc., and what you can deduct FROM YOUR HOUSE EXPENSES, if that’s where your workspace is, etc. Do look into them all, and keep good records! I happen to believe that alterations are much more difficult than sewing from scratch, and should be billed accordingly.Now, I’ll be a little ranty here myself. I think it’s wonderful when the ladies (or gentlemen) who come here choose to donate their time and skill to making something for a loved one – son, daughter, niece, nephew, parent, some stranger in need, as a wedding or christening gift, etc.HOWEVER – and it’s a BIG however, as you can see – it really frosts my shorts when people assume that, just because you know how to do something that they need done, that they are ENTITLED to have you do it for them – FOR FREE. I have encountered this galling phenomenon more times than I’d care to count, and not just in terms of stitchery. That just happens to be the one that I get tapped for most often, myself. And I’ve had people who were virtual strangers up and ask me to sew for them, either for free, or for considerably less than they’d pay the nice folks at the drycleaners’ shop!Your time, your skill, your knowledge – they are valuable. It’s a flipping INSULT for someone to assume they are ENTITLED to them, even if they are married to you. It’s a wedding band, not a badge of ownership! What galls me most is that sewing, particularly, is a skill that is often devalued at the same time it is being requested; if the requestor thinks to offer to pay for services rendered, he/she seems to think that something in the range of $2 per hour is a good rate. Speaking for myself only, if I’d spent the time in medical school instead of sewing, I’d be a neurosurgeon by now! I spent years learning to do what I do; the fact that I like what I do doesn’t mean I want to do it for someone else for FREE! Imagine asking a roofer, or a plumber, or a landscaper, for a favor of that nature! (I don’t mention doctors or lawyers, since I know that they also get tagged for free labor – it’s an interesting group to be paired with, isn’t it?) When’s the last time you had a muffler changed for free at a shop? It takes years of labor and study to do what we do – a good many of us read an awful lot of sewing books and magazines, and search out answers to technical problems in the community itself. In the Middle Ages, Guilds were created not only to pass on such knowledge, but to safeguard it as well. Your knowledge and skill are valuable assets, ladies and gentlemen. Don’t ever think they’re not, and don’t ever let anyone treat you, or those skills, casually. Don’t be taken for granted.And, Anonymous at 9:46, the very best of luck. Do let us know how you make out!
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Oh, and I’ve just remembered that I went to a great talk by Kaffe Fassett a few months ago with more sage advice. He was urging people not to be perfectionist in their needlecraft, but to get stuck in and learn by doing. Don’t fear “white glove mistakes” he said, meaning the imagined criticisms of the prissy crafting elite. Don’t be afraid of technique and a few holes (he was talking about knitting at that point). Once you begin, your hands start to do the work instead of your mind – your hands know what to do, he said. Kerpow!
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Thank you for this post. It is something I try to live by already, but need a reminder now and then. And how you applied it to your child is going to help me with mine, who is struggling with being scared for her first dance recital. I needed another way to explain the need to try things, at least once, and you have given me another approach and I very much appreciate it. So thanks.
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You just made my day. It IS humiliation/embarrassment that keep us from doing what we really want to do.Even though I am very very VERY good at embarrassing myself, I keep doing it.Guess that means I am a genius cause I have learned so much??? lol.Honestly, brilliant post!
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Nothing makes me sadder as a sewer than to “go through” the estate of a sewer and find carefully wrapped, expensive, gorgeous fabric that was never used. Too good. Too special. Too expensive. My mom has drawers full of beautiful objects, some given as gifts, that are too good to use. Or only for special occasions. There is nothing more special than today.Thanks Erin.
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Speaking of fear of fear of failure… I know I already posted a comment, but I’m going to post my equivalent of “asking out that cute boy” (one of my fears is asking people… well… anything I think might bother them). I’ve been editing for a crafting magazine that recently decided not to continue publication. So in the spirit of asking out cute boys, I know many of you readers are smart ladies and lots of you are editors or in that type of profession. So! My question is: If anyone knows of any jobs in the editing or crafting field (also: I used to edit and currently write children’s books, which I far prefer) I’ve got my resume posted here. Please do drop me a line?(AND I severely apologize if this is an inappropriate venue for this type of thing.)
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This is a wonderful sentiment that I can identify with (especially that paragraph about the orange and asking the guy out already. I would think my friends would have learned by now I am *not* the person to talk to if they’re looking for the kind of advice they *want* to hear as opposed to *needing* to hear.)
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My mom had a few yards of beautiful silk material she bought in Japan. She kept it for years before she got up the courage to cut it. Then she didn’t like the dress she made. But then we just took it apart and recut it into something else that turned into a smash hit! :0 As the Grateful Dead said, “The cards ain’t worth a ‘dang’ if you don’t lay them down!”
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Judging from my fabric stash, guilty as charged.I have two baskets of ironing, and my present when done is – a promise.I will cut out a pattern and then start sewing and create it.Honest!Also – my husband joyfully wears orange – and even better? It suits him!!!
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Thanks for the pep talk. Also, thanks for the comment about not being willing to pay $125 MAX for a dress. My sticking price is far less than that usually, and I always feel like I’m cheaper than the average shopper. Guess not!!
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Thank you for this post. I really needed to hear this today. – Becky
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Thanks for the mention of the 25% discount at Lanetz Living yesterday! I just bought 3 patterns. (I tell myself I’m saving on postage that way.) I’m thinking of blowing up all my lovely pattern covers and wearing them as sandwich boards, should I drag my feet any longer about jumping in and making the dresses. I mean, it would be a START… 🙂
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Rock on! Try, try again. Refuse to live in fear. Words I live by every day! :)(and I WILL master my serger, damnit!!)
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Just what I needed to read! I start a new job!!!Thank you!
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I like your analogy. But I have a different perspective on it. Instead of 4 yards on something this expensive, one yard would make a beautiful straight or A-line skirt for just about anybody at “52” wide. However, I am not too sure, but isn’t the pound stronger than our weak dollar right now. So wouldn’t it be more than 60 pounds. I don’t know the conversation rate and the last time I looked the Euro was 1.57 to our dollar. I haven’t seen the conversation in a couple of weeks now, but I am pretty sure the math should go in the other direction. I could be wrong too, in which case you can ignore the whole thing.
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Wow! Just what I needed to get started on my vintage dress patterns for summer. Thank you for great words!
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“they have their own humiliations to obsess over, and don’t have time for yours”That is FANTASTIC advice.
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Great. I got hooked on an out-of-stock pattern at the Lanetz sale, and had to order it from Sydney. Now my credit card number is floating around INTERNATIONALLY! But that looks like the perfect suit jacket!http://www.sydneysvintageclothing.com/cart/products/VINTAGE_60_S_MCCALLS_DRESS_SEWING_PATTERN_5511-10816-214.html?feed=Froogle
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Erin, thank you. I’m currently working through stash inherited from grandmom, aunt and mom, all of whom bought fabrics that were “too good” for them to use. Jeez, they’re not too good for me!I just made a dress out of a Liberty print paisley that I got (at a considerable discount) a while back, and while it almost physically hurt to take scissors to that gorgeous stuff, it’s also so much easier to sew quality fabric. Point: I should have made a muslin, the dress is a tad snug, but I also know I need to lose 10 lbs; maybe this is the motivation I needed? Thanks for the rant, the encouragement, and the wonderful stuff you post every day that sends me back into the workroom again and again.
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I like 99.9% of what you say, but I think it’s best to skip orange for me, being a redhead but the rest is great!!! Although, I’ll have to start making some of the patterns I’m afraid I’ll screw up so haven’t yet attempted. So Thanks for the inspiration, and the reminder that failing is only success in waiting disguise.
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I usually lurk around here and read this when you update, but I loved your comment about wearing orange.I use my red hair as an excuse to wear orange 🙂 In fact, I’m probably one of the only girls who wore an orange dress to prom.http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a188/ChristyFace/promdressshopping001.jpghttp://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a188/ChristyFace/n708295_30163727_3034.jpgI figured you’d appreciate that 🙂
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I love that orange prom dress! You look beautiful … and happy, which is more important. 🙂
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Thanks Erin!~Christy
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