Thanks to Lulu Yen, I know now of the existence of Vogue 890. Sadly, the one above on eBay isn't my size, but I'll get you, my pretty. I will.

So the plan is:

— get pattern in my size, or a close approximation thereof
— make pattern in fantastic fabric (maybe my brown roses fabric, which is still looking for a home?)
— await invitation to ball, which at this point is going to be one I attend as the duenna of my granddaughter, but that's okay. (For point of reference: my son is nine.)
— attend ball, carrying numerous useful items (sewing kit, handkerchief, cough drops, band-aids, bowling ball) in my capacious POCKETS!

I think it's a very good plan. What say you?

Excellent co-conspirator and artist Beebe (click on that link, you won't regret it) and I put together a scheme to give A. a present for her recent Birthday Celebration, and to thank A. for completing another kick-ass year of Being Awesome. The plan: he'd draw one of his fantastic characters in a dress of my choosing!

Above, you see the result — it's this dress, Spadea 1338. I'm sure you agree that Porthole Woman with Comb Hat is the perfect model!

Happy birthday, A.!

I'm reposting this from Mary Beth Klatt, the organizer: Chicago-area folks, come out for a fabric swap next week!

Here are the details:

Time: 6-8:30 p.m.

Date: Tuesday, May 19

Location: Rogers Park Public Library
6907 N Clark St
Chicago, IL 60626
2nd floor, south room

What: Fabric Swap

What's a Fabric Swap?: We'll be exchanging fabric, notions, patterns using play money, probably Monopoly dollars. During the set-up, we'll have a little show and tell. Wear your favorite sew garment for prizes to be supplied by Erin (??)

Few important details: Since this is a swap, no money/check can be exchanged on the premises. This is important. Anybody caught paying real U.S. dollars for items in the swap will be lashed with a tape measure or forced to count pattern pieces.

What can I bring?: Any type of fabric that's at least 1 yard long, 45 inches wide (I don't want to deal with remnants), notions, patterns are acceptable.

How can I help?: Thanks for asking. Here are some specific jobs we need:

1. Several cashiers' to help establish a 'value' to the fabric and pass out Monopoly money to 'sellers'
2. Several organizers to put fabric on various tables tagged according to fabric type (silk, cotton, polyester, knits, etc.).
3. A barker to call out lottery numbers so 'shoppers' can orderly browse items in the swap.
4. Someone to organize show and tell part of the swap.
5. Foodie to round up snacks for hungry shoppers. "Shoppers" are encouraged to bring chips, beverages, paper plates, and napkins.
5. A driver with enough room in the car to cart leftover unwanted fabric to local Salvation Army.

Ok, what next?: Email marybeth.klatt @@@gmail DOT com with Fabric Swap in the subject line, let me know you're coming and how you'd like to help OR leave a comment in Mary Beth's "Fabric Swap" blog post at thelazymilliner.blogspot.com.

I have a few more questions!: Email marybeth.klatt @@@ gmail dot com OR leave a comment on her blog.

[I'm going to try my best to be there, but I have a work trip on Monday that may run long. Cross your fingers!]

Sandra at Sandritocat sent me this fauxlero — doesn't it look real? The illustrator must have had a touch of PT Barnum in him.

Although, personally, if I were trying to "sell" the fauxlero, I wouldn't make Plaid Dress look quite so much as if she were trying to figure out what smelled so bad. (Either that or she's trying to see if the other woman is REALLY wearing an identical hat. And shoes. And earrings. And face.)

(This week's pattern story is brought to us courtesy of Rita at Cemetarian. Everything is 20% off with the coupon code FIESTY, for the next five days!)

Beige Dress: I get SO BORED waiting for the rest of the wall to come into being.

Blue Dress: Tell me about it. How am I supposed to decide on window treatments if there aren't any windows?

Beige Dress: When they said that life would be different at Flatland Estates, I didn't think it would be THIS different. Or this boring. Plus, I think I don't love my husband, Flash, any more.

Blue Dress: Well, that was the shortest distance between two points.

I love this dress, but I think I would have posted it even if I didn't because I love the surreal zebra mask. So much better, and funnier, than modeling the dresses wearing giant sunglasses. I understand the desire for anonymity, but giant sunglasses (especially worn inside) just make people look like drug addicts, or wannabe celebrities. But the zebra mask! The zebra mask is genius. (And the name of the Etsy shop is Animal Head Vintage, so there you go!)

And look at the POCKETS!

If you want this, click on the images to visit the listing (this seller has a lot of nice stuff, actually). Good luck!

Sorry for the radio silence the last couple days — I had a cold and an unexpected trip, which, taken together, meant I was in a Land of No Blogging. (I do NOT have the swine flu. Do not panic. Go about your normal business.)

Yep, I'm wearing this dress right now. It's the same pattern (Vogue 9760) once more — in fact, I made this one BEFORE I made the last two ones that I showed you. Which is why the print doesn't match as well.

I really like the orange facing. It's probably what makes me happiest about this dress. Aside from the fact that it's Liberty fabric, of course. I forget what the name of this Liberty pattern is, but it shows up on ebay.co.uk pretty often, if you are now struck by a boundless yearning for it, just keep an eye out.

And in a behind-the-scenes look, here's the hem:

I love this pattern — probably more so than it deserves, but hey, the heart wants what it wants, yes? — and I have one more cut out on the sewing table. I wouldn't put it past me, either, to make a couple more before I finally stop …

MANY thanks to Kay, who sent the link to this pattern this morning.

I feel that I should find this pattern in my size and make it up immediately, in case we are ever invaded and I find myself leading a cell of the Resistance. (I used to be obsessed with resistance narratives, especially Story of a Secret State and The Long Walk where people walk from Siberia to India. Okay, maybe I'm still obsessed.)

My point is, with this dress, the beret, and the jaunty neckerchief, I would SO be a leader of the Resistance. I'd have some unobjectionable cover story — running an orphanage? Where some of the "children" were actually "little people" AND demolition experts? — but in reality, I'd be obtaining false papers, robbing weapons transports, engaging in acts of sabotage, and using those fantastic pockets to hide my snub-nosed derringer. (And as long as I'm writing this, at some point, I get to fly a prop plane.)

Too bad my twin sister, the quisling in yellow, tries to betray me. Luckily, we knew she was up to no good, so we distracted her with a decoy mission while spiriting the real fugitives out of the country (that's where the prop plane comes in).

Or, you know, you could just make this dress and become the leader of something else (Resistances being fewer and farther between these days). Good luck!

Sheila at Out of the Ashes sent me a notice that she's having a big spring cleaning sale this week — 15% off, use the coupon code SPRINGCLEAN to get the discount.

This dress calls to me, more for the totally adorable pockets than for the kind of "huh?" capelet. And perhaps, just a little, for the green polka-dot hat. Some day when I don't have anything better to do I'm going to wear a green polka-dot hat, just for the hell of it. And whenever anyone says anything about it, I'm going to pretend I have NO IDEA what they're talking about.

Them: "Nice hat!"
Me: [blank stare]

I think I would have to do the same thing if I ever made a dress with a capelet, like this one. Either that, or I'd be humming the old Mighty Mouse theme song all day long. (HERE I come to SAVE the DAY!)

You know what else I can't see myself doing? Wearing a scarf that sticks out from between two buttons of the bodice, like Pink Dress in the background. I think the other two women are talking about how she crashed their Kapelet Klatsch without the necessary accouterments. (While doing their Seekrit Kapelet Klatsch Elbow-Shake, of course.)

Green Hat: The *nerve* of her! And what's with the scarf?
Floral Dress: I know! But pass the Kapelet Kahlua Kocktails round again, will you, darling? I'm losing my buzz!
Green Hat: HERE I come to SAVE the DAY!

VOICEOVER:

Here we see some rare examples of the species Homo Patternenvelopus.

Notice the older specimens are shy, and avoid direct eye contact (a sign of challenge). The young, however, are bolder, unless they venture too far from the mother. They also have not yet developed the distinctive hand coverings of the adults.

Homo Patternenvelopus breeds fissiparously, and the sprats grow to full size slowly. It is not known what triggers their reproduction, or how long it takes. Although, from the number of adult specimens we see with missing limbs, but without nearby sprats, it seems many of the sprats fail to thrive.

While Homo Patternenvelopus tends to congregate in twos and threes, they are not especially social animals, and often seem to treat each other with disdain, as you see here.

Remember that these creatures can be quite dangerous. Keep your hands inside the vehicle at all times. If provoked, their lightning reflexes and razor-sharp teeth can cause serious damage, or even death.

(From Wendy at Pattern Stash, who will be offering a 15% discount to Dress A Day readers beginning today, and continuing through Saturday and Sunday!)