Green: I don’t know … it’s hard to tell …
Yellow: Are you sure? The girl at the shop said that the neck vine for this dress should grow an inch an hour, but I think it’s still just as short as it was this morning.
Green: Well, it’s certainly wiggling, isn’t that a good sign?
Yellow: I knew I should have injected it deeper into my cervical vertebrae! I’m going to have to take it back and complain.
Floral dress: “I’d like to call today’s meeting of the Pissed-Off Jumper-Wearing Club to order.”
Black dress: “Hell no!”
Green dress: “Y’all go on ahead. I’m just gonna stare at things until they ignite.”
(From the Vintage Pattern Wiki here.)
Red: I’m going to win this Resolute Courageous Stare-Off if it is the last thing I do. I have purpose! I have wistful yet restrained yearning! I have a jaunty angle to my neck facings! I have dark, resolute gloves and a sensible yet stylish handbag, which almost certain includes war bonds! The trophy (and Captain Harding) is mine!
Green: I really wish I’d worn my glasses today. I can’t see a darn thing.
Pink: Would you look at that!
Blue: Huh.
Pink: Now that’s something you don’t see every day.
Blue: Not in our town, that’s for sure.
Pink: How do you think … what do they … well, doesn’t that look … dangerous? I mean, medically?
Blue: I dunno, they seem to be having fun.
Pink: All I know is, I’m going to have a LOT of questions for Margie at bridge tomorrow.
(Pattern from Janet at LanetzLiving.)
Pink: C’mon! What does it say? Let me look, why dontcha?
Blue: Shhh! The transmission is very faint. Those egghead boys in tech didn’t realize the powder would futz with the receiver.
Pink: I told them that would happen. Remember when the lipstick camera didn’t work because they didn’t realize the lens would get all smeary?
Blue: I think it’s coming in now … “Proceed to rendezvous. Ignore any Leprechaun people.”
Pink: Goddamn it, they’re drunk again. Oh … wait!
Today’s dress from Janet at Lanetz Living …
Yellow Dress: I wonder what it’s like in there. In the capsule.
White Dress: She looks so vibrant. So alive. So … three-dimensional. It must be wonderful, to be able to feel like that.
Black-and-White Dress: When I get out, I’m definitely going to eat the yellow one first.
One Dress, Three Thoughts
Gray: Now, wait … was it, “you put your RIGHT foot in?” Or does the left foot come first?
Blue: Goshdarnit, there’s a cigarette burn in this dress, too. I’ve got to stop smoking in the broom closet.
Pink: I’ve had my mouth open like this for forty-five minutes and I haven’t caught a fly yet. Ha! Another thing Mother was wrong about!
Tina: Listen, my friend Gina here, she really wants to punch your lights out.
Gina: (nods slowly)
Tina: What you did there, what you did — well, that is not okay.
Gina: (nods slowly)
Tina: I can hold her back for a little bit longer, but honestly, she’s got quite a temper. And she hates rudeness.
Gina: (nods slowly)
Tina: So just put that dress back on the rack so Gina can pick it up, just like she was gonna do before you butted yourself in, and then you can go about your day. Right, Gina?
Gina: (nods slowly)
Tina: That pink wasn’t really your color anyway. Have a good day now!
Hi! Hi! I am so glad you’re here! Really really glad! Like, super glad! I thought more people would come, but that’s okay! It’s really okay! It can be just you and me! We will have SO MUCH FUN. Like, tons of fun! What’s your name? There are nametags if you want one! I didn’t want one. My name is Samantha but people call me Sam. Or Sammy. Nobody calls me “Mantha,” though that would be funny. Or “Mantha Ray.” It would be funny to have a “Mantha Ray” costume. I think manta rays are beautiful, don’t you? Although they’re a little scary. Just a little.
ANYWAY! Let’s not talk about scary things! I’m glad you’re here! We can get started any time. Now, if you want! Do you want to start now? If you come a little bit closer we can start now. It’s very nice that you’re here! It’s nice to meet you! I would shake your hand but I don’t like germs. Not that I’m saying you’re germy. I just don’t like germs in general. Or milk. I don’t like milk in general either. But if you like milk that’s okay, I just didn’t bring any today. Because I don’t like it.
If you come a little closer we can get started. No, I don’t have anything behind my back. Why do you ask? WHY DON’T YOU COME A LITTLE CLOSER NOW?
Wait!
Come back!
Lillian: Your corsage is so … interesting, dear.
Gillian: I know! Isn’t it just to DIE?
Lillian: Well, it’s certainly unique.
Gillian: No, really, it’s to DIE. I believe it’s mutating, and I’m worried the tendrils will shoot up and strangle me. You’re wearing longer gloves, darling, do you think you could snatch it off and throw it into the fire?
Lillian: On three: one … two …
A Dress A Day 